This pregnancy came with a very different feel. It was a completely different experience than before. Not in any bad way...just different. Maybe it is because life was already so busy and hectic. Maybe it is because the third time around I was just a lot more familiar with what to expect and what not. I don't know for sure. But the pregnancy seemed to just fly by from the very beginning.
Then, about a month ago my doctor had me start going to non-stress tests a couple times a week because at a few of my apts his heart rate had been a bit accelerated. My doctor is phenomenal and is very proactive. The non-stress tests were just to keep a close eye on things even though she was not seriously worried. Thank goodness she did have me going to the non-stress tests or else we may not have ever known, but at my apt on Friday, July 16, while they were measuring my amniotic fluid it came up Quite low. At the previous apt it had been borderline low, but in a matter of days it had dropped low enough that it had to be addressed. I was a couple of days past 37 weeks, and since I was considered to be full term at that point and being that the fluid was low enough to cause concern, they decided it was safest for the baby and I to induce labor that afternoon. The doctor checked me and I was already 2 cm dilated. They said I could go home and get things in order but to be back at the hospital within 2 hours. I called Todd (who I believe was in as much shock as I was) and he immediately started prepping things for us to leave to the hospital. I got home, packed a bag (which had not been done yet since I was not at all expecting to have a baby 3 weeks early), took a shower, had David come over to watch the kids and we headed to the hospital.
Once we were at the hospital they got me all settled in a room and at about 5:30 started me on pitocin. My goal was to make it through this labor without an epidural. I had come very close to going completely natural with Kellen and for me it was just something that I wanted to have experienced from beginning to end in its raw form. I just wanted to know what the Whole thing felt like the way nature intended it to be and it was something I wanted to be able to say I had done in life. Suddenly though, being induced and having it happen so out of the blue, I was a bit worried about my ability to cope.
Labor started a lot slower this time around. Contractions got going, but it took them awhile to start being very productive contractions. At 1 am the checked me and I was just at 3 cm. They broke my water and that is when the real contractions kicked in. I labored through pretty tough contractions for the next 2 hours. Around 3 am they came and checked me again and they painfully told me I was at a 4. At this point I was beginning to feel very tired and very defeated. The contractions got much worse the next half hour and by 3:45 I was just fed up with the whole "natural" feeling of it all and was to worn out to go on. I begged the nurse to check me again because I didn't want to get the epidural if I was passed 7 cm. But she said I was only at a loose 5. I was just done, so I asked for the epidural. The nurse tried to push it off, but I was losing my nerve and insisted she get someone in there. 10 or so min later they had me sit up and began the prepping me for the epidural. Sitting up in that bed, trying not to move was the worst thing and the worst pain I had ever experienced. Right as they were putting in the epidural catheter I started to feel pressure during a contraction and thought to myself, "There is NO way I can be feeling this kind of pressure. I was only at 5 cm 15 minutes ago!"
But sure enough the pressure I was feeling was Very real. The minute the epidural catheter was done being put in they let me lay down. Mind you at this point they had not administered the medicine through the epidural, they just had it put in. The moment I lay down on my back the pressure came back in full force. I was one of those crazy laboring women who was yelling "I have to push! I have to push!" The nurse quickly checked me and said "I am so sorry. You are fully dilated and crowning" (or something close to that). The anesthesiologist tried to quickly administer some medicine to numb the urge to push, but there was no hope of that. I had to push Now! The nurse ran out and ran back in followed by a number of hospital staff. Mind you this was all a big blur to me due to the fact that all I could focus on was the pain and the need to push. As soon as I saw what looked like a doctor running in I started pushing. The doctor got there in enough time to sit on the bed, Todd quickly grabbed the video camera and a small amount of screaming and pushing later Conner slipped out into the world. It all happened so fast and seemed so intense to me that when they were suddenly asking if I wanted my baby on me it seemed almost surreal that he was really out and actually here. But the minute that he was on my chest everything slowed down and there was my little boy. A moment later I realized it had all happened so quickly and chaotically that my mom was not even in the room when he was born. They had made her step out for the epidural and he had come so quickly that no one had a second to go and grab her and get her back in the room :( It still amazes me that I went from being 5 cm to Conner being born in a little over 20 minutes. Yikes!
I am very happy with myself that I got to experience natural childbirth from beginning to end. And now that I have done it I am happy to say I don't think I will ever be doing it again!!! It just got so crazy and hectic at the end. Next time I would like it to slow down a bit more, be able to be a little more in the moment and have my mother in there as well :) But it really was an amazing experience!
Life with Conner has been wonderful! He has been such a great baby. He is so content and easy going. He can sleep through all the crazy noise and activity his siblings can dish out. He even manages to sleep through their hugs and kisses and all sorts of love and attention. He is such an adorable little guy. Makenna and Kellen have both adjusted so well. We had been quite worried how Kellen would do, being such a Momma's boy and all. But he has not been jealous at all and has done a really wonderful job of going with the flow and adjusting to all life's changes. It feels good having the three of them. I am so in love with my little family. I feel so content and happy and fulfilled with all that life has given me. Life is at a very good place. I know I am so richly blessed. And there is no joy in this life more overwhelming and consuming than the joy that family brings.
Here is a look at the last week or so with our littlest boy Conner.
Such a handsome little boy! I love that he looks like his family but definitely has his own unique look as well.
Grammy took a week off work to help out around the house. We all love our Grammy time and are missing her very much!
Conner's first sponge bath at home....they never appreciate all the pampering they get when they are young ;)
A very happy and in love mommy!
Makenna couldn't be more excited and proud to be a big sister again. She is so great with Conner, adores him to death and will hold him as much as you will let her! I am so lucky to have her as a daughter and such a sweet sister.
He almost always sleeps with his arms up by his head. I find it so cute!
Getting more and more alert every day! You can't tell too much in these pics but his eyes are quite blue, at least for now.
Am I not the luckiest Momma in the world??
Kellen just makes me smile. He is so in love with the baby and is clumsy about it. It is just so darn cute. I love my boys so much!